My blog name, "Crazy Mama" is not just a cute title. I am CRAZY. I'm not looking for any sympathy...just in the process of learning to love the weird things about me that don't look like they will be changing for the better anytime soon.
The straight A, parent pleasing, perfectionist child has grown up to be...the can't say no, people pleasing, obsessive compulsive adult. Surprise!
And let's just say that quitting my job to stay home has NOT made it any better...I now have ALL DAY LONG to obsess over every little thing.
So after careful analysis, here's what I have determined so far.
I am a procrastinator...if I can't do it ALL AT ONCE and I can't do it PERFECTLY, I would rather not do it at all. This includes dishes, laundry, yardwork, etc. Pretty much all the things I SHOULD be doing while I stay home. It also includes things I love, like scrapbooking; I hate to start something if I don't know I can get it totally perfect and complete. Which is impossible to do with 2 toddlers around.
I am lazy...I DON'T want to 'work' at potty training (I had children 18 months apart...diapers obviously don't bother me.) I would like for the children to go dig through the trash, play in the sink, eat Doritoes under the bed or whatever it is they do when I'm not looking so I can go WATCH YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS. I would rather go buy new underwear (yay, shopping addiction!) than switch the loads of laundry.
I have an addictive personality...my life used to be filled with perfectly written lessons in my plan book, baking cookies for my kindergarteners, organizing field trips by myself (because no one else would do it RIGHT, of course), terrorizing my principal and superintendent with my suggestions for making our school better, tutoring, and then coming home to 2 babies to make dinner, play, give baths, say hello to my husband, and watch lots of TV until I fell asleep with my clothes on.
Now that I've quit my job, I've found that other 'addictions' have filled the place of all that busy-ness. Must have coffee (was never a coffee drinker)! Must know what happened on the Young and the Restless! Must plant a garden and grow vegetables! Must find something to eat with lots of sugar and fat! Play Tetris online! Worry constantly about how my old school will ever FUNCTION without me! Go to Walmart twice a week so we have EVERYTHING we could ever need! Check eight thousand blogs 5 times a day! Write blogs! Check for comments on blogs! Check email! Bake cakes for people! Make scrapbooks for people! Read books (I'm in the middle of 4 different ones right now)! I am discovering that I must be stimulated ALL THE TIME.
So why did I turn out this way?
I regard my mother as a free spirit, a laid back sort of person, although at times, I suspect some of this craziness must have come from her and she has just learned to control the freakiness of our genes. She once told me she didn't know how someone like her could have raised someone like me. She thinks I worry about stuff way too much.
And then there is my Granny (mom's mom). She tells me she doesn't know WHERE I got my parenting skills (implying I have none), and that I just don't worry like a 'normal' mother should, because I let my children do CRAZY BAD THINGS, like letting them go on a boat ride with us, and letting them play in the fenced back yard while I watch them out the window, and eat POPTARTS for breakfast. What she doesn't know is that to get a little peace and quiet, I sometimes lock them in their rooms with a supply of Krispy Kremes, Pepsi, small, sharp objects, and some matches and tell them to have fun.
My mom has successfully fought the crazy battle, and Granny obviously surrendered.
So maybe there's my answer. It's just genetics. Why waste energy fighting that? And now I will go have some cake.
The straight A, parent pleasing, perfectionist child has grown up to be...the can't say no, people pleasing, obsessive compulsive adult. Surprise!
And let's just say that quitting my job to stay home has NOT made it any better...I now have ALL DAY LONG to obsess over every little thing.
So after careful analysis, here's what I have determined so far.
I am a procrastinator...if I can't do it ALL AT ONCE and I can't do it PERFECTLY, I would rather not do it at all. This includes dishes, laundry, yardwork, etc. Pretty much all the things I SHOULD be doing while I stay home. It also includes things I love, like scrapbooking; I hate to start something if I don't know I can get it totally perfect and complete. Which is impossible to do with 2 toddlers around.
I am lazy...I DON'T want to 'work' at potty training (I had children 18 months apart...diapers obviously don't bother me.) I would like for the children to go dig through the trash, play in the sink, eat Doritoes under the bed or whatever it is they do when I'm not looking so I can go WATCH YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS. I would rather go buy new underwear (yay, shopping addiction!) than switch the loads of laundry.
I have an addictive personality...my life used to be filled with perfectly written lessons in my plan book, baking cookies for my kindergarteners, organizing field trips by myself (because no one else would do it RIGHT, of course), terrorizing my principal and superintendent with my suggestions for making our school better, tutoring, and then coming home to 2 babies to make dinner, play, give baths, say hello to my husband, and watch lots of TV until I fell asleep with my clothes on.
Now that I've quit my job, I've found that other 'addictions' have filled the place of all that busy-ness. Must have coffee (was never a coffee drinker)! Must know what happened on the Young and the Restless! Must plant a garden and grow vegetables! Must find something to eat with lots of sugar and fat! Play Tetris online! Worry constantly about how my old school will ever FUNCTION without me! Go to Walmart twice a week so we have EVERYTHING we could ever need! Check eight thousand blogs 5 times a day! Write blogs! Check for comments on blogs! Check email! Bake cakes for people! Make scrapbooks for people! Read books (I'm in the middle of 4 different ones right now)! I am discovering that I must be stimulated ALL THE TIME.
So why did I turn out this way?
I regard my mother as a free spirit, a laid back sort of person, although at times, I suspect some of this craziness must have come from her and she has just learned to control the freakiness of our genes. She once told me she didn't know how someone like her could have raised someone like me. She thinks I worry about stuff way too much.
And then there is my Granny (mom's mom). She tells me she doesn't know WHERE I got my parenting skills (implying I have none), and that I just don't worry like a 'normal' mother should, because I let my children do CRAZY BAD THINGS, like letting them go on a boat ride with us, and letting them play in the fenced back yard while I watch them out the window, and eat POPTARTS for breakfast. What she doesn't know is that to get a little peace and quiet, I sometimes lock them in their rooms with a supply of Krispy Kremes, Pepsi, small, sharp objects, and some matches and tell them to have fun.
My mom has successfully fought the crazy battle, and Granny obviously surrendered.
So maybe there's my answer. It's just genetics. Why waste energy fighting that? And now I will go have some cake.
1 Comments:
Oh my gosh. It is almost as if I had written this post myself. I was not a straight A parent pleaser, I was actually the opposite. The rest? Spot on. (WEll, the soaps differ. I like ABC soaps!)
My kids are almost 18 months apart. I am a procrastinator. I am lazy. I am addictive (I quit smoking over a year ago but still have one any time I can get away with it).
I don't know how I turned out this way either. I just always was this way, I guess.
Hey, if you are like me though, at least we love our kids without reservation. They are happy, and they are healthy. My parents and grandma actually think I am TOO strict with my kids because I believe a 2 year old is capable of obeying me and he has actual consequences if he doesn't. Imagine that!!
Hang in there. I'm right here with ya. I am going to have to keep reading to find out stuff like, how old your kids are now...where abouts you live in this big country, and all that fun stuff. Thanks for stopping by my blog too..
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