...continued from yesterday...
Friday, December 22:
We pull into the in-laws driveway(Remember? The Martha Stewart-beautifully decorated-perfectly clean in-laws), and Garrett unplugs his nostrils long enough to tell us that his tummy hurts. Uh-oh.
We unwrap lots of wonderful gifts, the kids play their "delightful grandchildren" role quite well, and we sit down for dinner in the formal dining room. I hear Garrett yell from the other room, and arrive in the living room just in time to see him get a terrified look in his eyes and attempt to race from the living room (new hardwood) into Grandma and Grandpa's master bedroom / bathroom (new cream carpet).
Oh yeah. He did. But with my thoughts ONLY ON THE FLOORING, I grab his shoulders and spin him away from the carpet and onto the hardwood / oriental rug instead. Nothing says Merry Christmas quite like your only grandson vomiting all over your floor, right Grandma?
And then I proceeded to do what only a mother could have done. Gave him a bath (in the brand-new-never-been-used-only-for-resale-value-Jacuzzi tub), popped in a movie, snuggled him on the leather couch (with a towel underneath him), gave him a trash can, and went back to finish my dinner.
Just a few minutes later, I heard another call for help and settled in for Round Two. We decided to risk the throwing up in the car scenario and head on back home. So we packed up everything that we had just unloaded a few hours earlier, gave Garrett a trash can, and drove back to our house. Garrett fell asleep with his head in the trashcan.
We get home and tuck everyone in, and lay down for some rest to prepare for what is sure to be a long night. Unfortunately for the hubby and I, it was not Garrett who was up all night...it was US. Blech. ALL.NIGHT.LONG.
Saturday, December 23:
A blur. I dozed on and off all day, with weird dreams about unwrapped Christmas gifts and "A Christmas Story" (you'll shoot your eye out, kid!). Hubby spent most of his day in the bathroom. We call a friend to leave us some Seven-Up and bread on our porch. We're not exactly sure what the kids did all day. How did Charles and Caroline Ingalls MANAGE when they all had the fever 'n ague in their little house on the prairie??? And they had WOLVES on top of that. Gah.
Later in the evening, we get an emergency-ish call from the in-laws. I can't really share a lot of details here, but I can say that you should listen to the first few words of this song. There were some broken bones involved (not OURS, thankfully), and a very good friend who saved us with some spur of the moment babysitting for Garrett and Laura. Everyone is fine now, but let's just say that was NOT the best way to end a day of puking and fever.
And the presents did not get wrapped. But you probably guessed that.
Sunday, December 24:
Skipped church. Wrapped the damn presents (And do you know I was done with shopping a month ago? This is what happens when you try to be on the ball). Went to my mom's for Christmas #2 later in the afternoon. Opened gifts, smelled the food but couldn't eat it, and slept until we had to leave for Christmas #3 at my Granny's. Once again, opened gifts, smelled the food but couldn't eat it, couldn't wait to get home.
And oh yeah, we still had to put out carrots for Santa's reindeer, cookies for Santa (which Santa really did not feel up to eating), and all that crap Santa bought a month ago. Ho-ho-ho. Blech.
Monday, December 25:
Force down eggnog and donuts. Because it is CHRISTMAS AND I AM MISSING THE CHRISTMAS FOODS. My stomach is not happy with me. Back to Seven-Up and crackers.
Watch the children delight in their gifts and stockings. Most pleasant moment of the last few days, for sure. Then it's off to Christmas #4 at the husband's grandparent's house. We are able to stomach some of the delicious holiday treats.
Next we go back to my Granny's for Christmas #5 (stockings, games, and snacks). I sleep while the children run wild with cousins, and while hubby SPANKS the rest of the family in a heated game of Monopoly.
And then we go home and collapse.
Tuesday, December 26 - Present
What happened? Did we miss Christmas? What???? You say it's OVER?
I think it's safe to say that I may block out memories of this Christmas. Not the best we've ever had. The stomach flu sucks. Sucks big.
However, we spent the remainder of our vacation (hubby was off all week) sleeping, shopping, playing with Garrett and Laura, catching up on our eating, visiting some friends, and doing some home-improvement.
We also let two small children take control of the house with their stockpile of toys, drink soda, eat copious amounts of candy, watch unlimited DVD's, and go napless on occasion.
And now, here I am. The hubby is back at work (I fear he may never come home), and I am supposed to undo the damage done during our week of non-parenting.
Um, anyone want to babysit?
Friday, December 22:
We pull into the in-laws driveway(Remember? The Martha Stewart-beautifully decorated-perfectly clean in-laws), and Garrett unplugs his nostrils long enough to tell us that his tummy hurts. Uh-oh.
We unwrap lots of wonderful gifts, the kids play their "delightful grandchildren" role quite well, and we sit down for dinner in the formal dining room. I hear Garrett yell from the other room, and arrive in the living room just in time to see him get a terrified look in his eyes and attempt to race from the living room (new hardwood) into Grandma and Grandpa's master bedroom / bathroom (new cream carpet).
Oh yeah. He did. But with my thoughts ONLY ON THE FLOORING, I grab his shoulders and spin him away from the carpet and onto the hardwood / oriental rug instead. Nothing says Merry Christmas quite like your only grandson vomiting all over your floor, right Grandma?
And then I proceeded to do what only a mother could have done. Gave him a bath (in the brand-new-never-been-used-only-for-resale-value-Jacuzzi tub), popped in a movie, snuggled him on the leather couch (with a towel underneath him), gave him a trash can, and went back to finish my dinner.
Just a few minutes later, I heard another call for help and settled in for Round Two. We decided to risk the throwing up in the car scenario and head on back home. So we packed up everything that we had just unloaded a few hours earlier, gave Garrett a trash can, and drove back to our house. Garrett fell asleep with his head in the trashcan.
We get home and tuck everyone in, and lay down for some rest to prepare for what is sure to be a long night. Unfortunately for the hubby and I, it was not Garrett who was up all night...it was US. Blech. ALL.NIGHT.LONG.
Saturday, December 23:
A blur. I dozed on and off all day, with weird dreams about unwrapped Christmas gifts and "A Christmas Story" (you'll shoot your eye out, kid!). Hubby spent most of his day in the bathroom. We call a friend to leave us some Seven-Up and bread on our porch. We're not exactly sure what the kids did all day. How did Charles and Caroline Ingalls MANAGE when they all had the fever 'n ague in their little house on the prairie??? And they had WOLVES on top of that. Gah.
Later in the evening, we get an emergency-ish call from the in-laws. I can't really share a lot of details here, but I can say that you should listen to the first few words of this song. There were some broken bones involved (not OURS, thankfully), and a very good friend who saved us with some spur of the moment babysitting for Garrett and Laura. Everyone is fine now, but let's just say that was NOT the best way to end a day of puking and fever.
And the presents did not get wrapped. But you probably guessed that.
Sunday, December 24:
Skipped church. Wrapped the damn presents (And do you know I was done with shopping a month ago? This is what happens when you try to be on the ball). Went to my mom's for Christmas #2 later in the afternoon. Opened gifts, smelled the food but couldn't eat it, and slept until we had to leave for Christmas #3 at my Granny's. Once again, opened gifts, smelled the food but couldn't eat it, couldn't wait to get home.
And oh yeah, we still had to put out carrots for Santa's reindeer, cookies for Santa (which Santa really did not feel up to eating), and all that crap Santa bought a month ago. Ho-ho-ho. Blech.
Monday, December 25:
Force down eggnog and donuts. Because it is CHRISTMAS AND I AM MISSING THE CHRISTMAS FOODS. My stomach is not happy with me. Back to Seven-Up and crackers.
Watch the children delight in their gifts and stockings. Most pleasant moment of the last few days, for sure. Then it's off to Christmas #4 at the husband's grandparent's house. We are able to stomach some of the delicious holiday treats.
Next we go back to my Granny's for Christmas #5 (stockings, games, and snacks). I sleep while the children run wild with cousins, and while hubby SPANKS the rest of the family in a heated game of Monopoly.
And then we go home and collapse.
Tuesday, December 26 - Present
What happened? Did we miss Christmas? What???? You say it's OVER?
I think it's safe to say that I may block out memories of this Christmas. Not the best we've ever had. The stomach flu sucks. Sucks big.
However, we spent the remainder of our vacation (hubby was off all week) sleeping, shopping, playing with Garrett and Laura, catching up on our eating, visiting some friends, and doing some home-improvement.
We also let two small children take control of the house with their stockpile of toys, drink soda, eat copious amounts of candy, watch unlimited DVD's, and go napless on occasion.
And now, here I am. The hubby is back at work (I fear he may never come home), and I am supposed to undo the damage done during our week of non-parenting.
Um, anyone want to babysit?
12 Comments:
WOW! I am speechless. I seriously can't think of any response. My goodness! You deserve something huge!!
Oh, you poor thing. The stomach flu is THE worst and that's why I am deathly afraid of anyone who has it (you can't catch it over the computer, right?). :) I think it's the nastiest thing in the world and I think all scientists everywhere should devote ALL of their time, starting NOW, to coming up with something that will completely destroy the virus FOREVER. Can you tell I'm a little paranoid? Anyway, you DO deserve something nice, so positive thoughts are being sent your way.
And, wow, that's a lot of Christmases you have to get through!
That little house on the prairie must have had some stench to it. You really needed Mr. Edwards to come and play Santa for you. That's a shitey Christmas I have to say, I'm impressed you made it to 5 things. I could hardly handle the two I went two and I wasn't sick.
Good grief! Hectic schedule and the stomach flu??
it's times like this i wish i lived closer, because you totally need a break and i'd love to help!
You poor thing you. I would babysit but I'm trying to find someone to take my two b/c I need them gone in order to get my house (and their 1,000 new toys) back in order.
I'm glad the stomach bug at least left L and G by Christmas though so they could enjoy it. I guess that's the main thing.
I'm glad you are finally feeling better too.
Take care of yourself!
Ouch, dude. Just ouch.
I hope you are all feeling better, and that you CONTINUE feeling better indefinitely. Being sick while pregnant was bad enough, but being sick and pregnant AND having to care for two other small people?? You deserve some kind of medal!
Here's to a healthier household!
And I thought I had it bad with three different Christmases to do, but you have five that must be a world record!!! I agree the stomach flu is the worst we all had it last February only I got it first and still had it when everyone else started getting sick. It ended with me having to go to the emergency room and get two bags of IV fluid, yuck. I hope your new year brings much happiness.
Ugh ugh UGH. I am so with you on the stomach flu over the last few days. And I don't know what's worse, the sickness part of it, or the laundry and bathroom scrubbing that follows. Awful.
I hope you're feeling ok now.
Oh lordy how did you survive? The parts of this post that didn't make me laugh almost made me cry. I am glad you have a sense of humor and no matter what you find the funny and share it with us. But really,sending postive thoughts your way and I think that you must be a very strong Mommy.
Oh gosh. We had about the same Christmas as you! My 1 year old woke up the Thursday before puking all over me. The next night it was my 2.5 year old. The next day it was me. No actual vomit on Christmas, but not a whole lot of eating or enjoying going on. Yuck. BTW, this is the lady formerlly known as Boring Tales. I'm BACK! I wish you had a better Christmas. How was your new years?
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