Now that I'm a stay at home mom, it's easy to feel like my main purpose in life is to keep Young and the Restless on the air
(Good LORD, who killed Carmen Mesta already?!?), wash endless loads of laundry (
I just washed a red load...WHY are there more reds in this hamper, dammit?!?), and clean neverending piles of dishes
(Can you all not use your fingers for just ONE FREAKING MEAL?). So as someone who spends the better part of her day searching for the deeper meaning in a pair of size 4T underwear with skid marks, I often become frustrated with the numerous tales of women who have made their fortune through an invention they created while being a stay at home mother "just like me".
And the list could go on. Why can't I think of something like that? Why can't I turn my current talents of Can Complete Nine Loads of Laundry in One Day and Can Hear Fridge Being Opened By Toddlers From Five Rooms Away into a million dollar idea?
So here are my latest ideas. Don't go stealing them.
1. The Toy Vacuum. Gathers toys in one fell swoop, without the need for crawling on the floor for retrieval, then deposits them into appropriate receptacle. Especially handy after holidays:
2. The Binky Helper. Tired of watching your baby spit out the binky over and over and screaming loudly for you to run over and replace it? Tired of repeating this scenario every 45 seconds? You need the Binky Helper. Comes with soft, cushioned straps that fasten around binky and gently around baby's head to keep that binky in place. Break-Away feature ensures safety in case baby spits up. Pictured below is the Original Binky Helper.
3. The Mom Store. I give partial credit to E for helping me come up with this one. Wouldn't it be nice if Target/Walmart/your local grocery store would have a bonus store set up especially for moms in a hurry who need to get in and get out as quickly as possible?
For example, "Aisle 1 - Essentials", would be stocked with only milk, diapers, and bread.
Or "Aisle 2 - It's Going To Be A Long Night", carrying beer, rum, pacifiers, and infant gas drops.
Or my personal favorite, "Aisle 3 - Mommy Binge / Binge Recovery", filled with Oreos, Doritos, and Slim Fast.
So what do you think? Am I on my way to my first million?
Labels: Stay at home motherhood
20 Comments:
Your ideas are fabulous. I especially love the Binky Helper. Kind of like "headgear" that I remember some kids wearing back in junior high. :)
I also sit and wonder why I can't come up with some million-dollar idea....all of the ones you mentioned are so obvious, it's like, "Duh, why didn't I think of that?"
You're on to something, Stacey.
Hi, I am new to your blog!
my husband and I are trying to start one of those businesses and we hope it takes off... although our ideas aren't as good as yours! are you copyrighting this stuff?? :)
I'm loving the Mommy Store. I would like to request that it have a drive-thru though. Load me up on Aisle 2 and Aisle 3 please. Thanks, have a good day.
Oh yeah, the Mommy Store! Great idea! Do they have babysitters too? Because, this would be an added luxery and increase the amount of shoppers.
And, seriously, who DID kill Carmen? I mean, come on, how long are they gonna drag that crap out? You would've thought that they would have played the Sheila thing out far, but not the carmen killing!
I have often wondered the same thing. There is actually an invention out there that my sister thought about first, but I won't bore you with the details, lol.
Drive thru is a must. LOL Plus maybe they could offer house cleaning services to go along with babysitting services. Can you think of something for the whiners?
The Mom Store is a stellar idea. In conjunction with Aisle 2, there should be some sort of stand set up, you know, like Super Walmart's McDonalds' or Subway, where you can do a quick shot before you begin the heavy shopping. Two shots, if you had to bring the kids. They would totally make more money off us that way....
I would like to order the toy vac! I'll actually take two and give one as a gift. :)
Oh! Girl! You are brilliant!
Love the ideas.
I would totally shop at that store! Especially if you put in the shot aisle!
Yeah, nothing makes me madder than knowing ALL I need is milk and it's at the furthest point from the door. I know the marketing guys do that on purpose, knowing we (or our darling children) will think of other things we 'need' on our way there and back but come on already!! Sick kids, pg tired mom, dinnertime - you don't feel one iota bad about making her haul butt to the back of the store?? I've always said if any store has the brains to put in a small stock of bread and milk at the front, I'm switching stores, no questions asked. ;)
I know that toy vacuum. He lives in my house and the proper receptacles are the great big garbage can. If you don't pick it up, he throws it out. Unfortunately, he also cleans up grown up toys, including important paperwork.
What about that ladie who started Jibbets? Those little things that you put in the holes of your Crocs. The owner of Crocs paid her $20 million for her idea AND she still gets to run her little company. I'm with you sister!
I think those ideas are fantastic...and I think the store should be online so that you can shop from home and have them deliver.
I love your ideas....especially The Mom Store! Seriously, are you copyrighting this stuff?!
Ahh, written by a true Mom. I love your ideas and you are one of those gals that I would totally hang out with. You have a wicked sense of humor. Some people don't you know? You always crack me up. I think we are all gonna love going through this pregnancy with you.
Have you signed up for gmail yet? I did send you an invite did I?
The binky thing. Dude...EVERY mother needs one of those. You should totally invent that. I'll be the first in line!
Oh these a good. Let me know if you need any product testers ;)
i love those ideas, and have i told you how funny i think you are?
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