Just thought I should post so you'd all know there has been no labor action as of yet. Everybody is on high watch, which means every time I call my mom, she responds with, "ARE YOU IN LABOR?" instead "Hello", and every time I make a pained face due to a random contraction, my husband looks like he might throw up. And then, there is the dreaded, "HAVEN'T YOU HAD THAT BABY YET?".
I actually started having some pretty good contractions at around seven last night, and they kept me awake until about one in the morning. Seth said I had them most of the night, as I would moan in my sleep every time one started and ended.
I go to the doctor in the morning for my first "exam", so there had better be some dilating going on in there. I'll keep you all posted.
The nesting fit is over, for the most part, if you don't count that I meticulously Clorox-wiped the washer and dryer on Saturday.
I'm just getting restless now - my anxiousness about labor, delivery, post-partum depression, leaking breasts, and being the mother of three small kids is taking me over, mind and body(Wasn't I just a cheerleader a few minutes ago? Wasn't I just downing a six pack of Rolling Rock on my 21st birthday? Didn't I just get a college degree and a paying job not long ago? WHEN DID I BECOME A MOTHER OF THREE??????).
I can't seem to find much that is worth my effort lately. Scrapbooking? Don't feel like walking down the stairs to get to the scrap stuff. Baking? You would NOT want to order a cake from me right now. Shopping? Only if you'll push me around the store in a wheel chair.
I WANT to play with the kids, take them to the park, hang out at the library. I WANT to visit friends, catch a movie, cuddle with my husband (who I'm sure is dying for a little more than cuddling). I just CAN'T. The guilt is eating me up. My kids will remember this as the summer that I totally ignored them. Shame on me.
I'm just rambling out thoughts now, so feel free to skim to the end and hope for better tomorrow.
A lot of uncomfortable feelings are surfacing lately, which I'm sure means impending labor.
First, the physical - it usually feels like baby is trying to dig her way out. Seven pounds of very active baby attempting to cross her legs and turn over inside me is very uncomfortable. Can't sleep, raging heartburn at bedtime, swollen ankles, back pain, tight maternity tops that weren't tight last week, the bathroom visits every 15 minutes, and more horrifying tales that I am not willing to share on the internet.
In short, three babies? Have finished off what remained of my body. But I still have all my teeth, thank God.
I don't want to be pregnant anymore. I want to be pregnant forever and ever. Go figure.
I am afraid of post partum depression. I've been there, twice, and don't want to do it again.
What if there is something wrong with the baby?
I'm terrified of labor and delivery. I am planning on no drugs, just as I did with Laura. Just because I did it once, does it really mean I can do it again?
My children will hate me for ruining their perfect little lives with a screaming new baby who is attached to me all day long.
What if labor really does kill me?
I will lose my mind trying to stay home with three little kids.
We are going to go broke.
No more "me" time. And I'm verrrry selfish, by the way.
I'm missing BlogHer this year. :(
Only a few weeks (days????) of unlimited frozen coffee drinks and eating whatever the baby dictates (sometimes it's doughnuts, and sometimes it's bananas, okay?). Then, the weight must go. And that depresses me. Back to Fat Friday posts.
No one will babysit three children at once.
No time for sex, ever again. And, my husband will leave me after he sees how this last (WAAAAHHHH *sniffle*) baby has ruined my body.
I'm scared, about everything in general. I need to cry. Make me feel better.
I actually started having some pretty good contractions at around seven last night, and they kept me awake until about one in the morning. Seth said I had them most of the night, as I would moan in my sleep every time one started and ended.
I go to the doctor in the morning for my first "exam", so there had better be some dilating going on in there. I'll keep you all posted.
The nesting fit is over, for the most part, if you don't count that I meticulously Clorox-wiped the washer and dryer on Saturday.
I'm just getting restless now - my anxiousness about labor, delivery, post-partum depression, leaking breasts, and being the mother of three small kids is taking me over, mind and body(Wasn't I just a cheerleader a few minutes ago? Wasn't I just downing a six pack of Rolling Rock on my 21st birthday? Didn't I just get a college degree and a paying job not long ago? WHEN DID I BECOME A MOTHER OF THREE??????).
I can't seem to find much that is worth my effort lately. Scrapbooking? Don't feel like walking down the stairs to get to the scrap stuff. Baking? You would NOT want to order a cake from me right now. Shopping? Only if you'll push me around the store in a wheel chair.
I WANT to play with the kids, take them to the park, hang out at the library. I WANT to visit friends, catch a movie, cuddle with my husband (who I'm sure is dying for a little more than cuddling). I just CAN'T. The guilt is eating me up. My kids will remember this as the summer that I totally ignored them. Shame on me.
I'm just rambling out thoughts now, so feel free to skim to the end and hope for better tomorrow.
A lot of uncomfortable feelings are surfacing lately, which I'm sure means impending labor.
First, the physical - it usually feels like baby is trying to dig her way out. Seven pounds of very active baby attempting to cross her legs and turn over inside me is very uncomfortable. Can't sleep, raging heartburn at bedtime, swollen ankles, back pain, tight maternity tops that weren't tight last week, the bathroom visits every 15 minutes, and more horrifying tales that I am not willing to share on the internet.
In short, three babies? Have finished off what remained of my body. But I still have all my teeth, thank God.
I don't want to be pregnant anymore. I want to be pregnant forever and ever. Go figure.
I am afraid of post partum depression. I've been there, twice, and don't want to do it again.
What if there is something wrong with the baby?
I'm terrified of labor and delivery. I am planning on no drugs, just as I did with Laura. Just because I did it once, does it really mean I can do it again?
My children will hate me for ruining their perfect little lives with a screaming new baby who is attached to me all day long.
What if labor really does kill me?
I will lose my mind trying to stay home with three little kids.
We are going to go broke.
No more "me" time. And I'm verrrry selfish, by the way.
I'm missing BlogHer this year. :(
Only a few weeks (days????) of unlimited frozen coffee drinks and eating whatever the baby dictates (sometimes it's doughnuts, and sometimes it's bananas, okay?). Then, the weight must go. And that depresses me. Back to Fat Friday posts.
No one will babysit three children at once.
No time for sex, ever again. And, my husband will leave me after he sees how this last (WAAAAHHHH *sniffle*) baby has ruined my body.
I'm scared, about everything in general. I need to cry. Make me feel better.
Labels: Baby Number 3, I'm crazy, pregnancy
12 Comments:
Oh sweetheart! You'll be fine, everything will be fine. Your precious kids are going to LOVE the new baby and your husband will love you forever.
Just sounds like you need to have that baby soon :) Can't wait to hear the good news.
I'm excited for you.
Now that is the Stacey I know and love!! That happy person was pissing me off! JK! :)I became friends with you during your first pregancy and those tirades (spelling?-is that even a word?) and became insanely fond of you, drama and fits. So-WELCOME BACK!
And yes you will be fine-as always. You will just have to whine your way back-but hey-bring ont the margaritas!! LOL
I hope to see you this week. :)
This can only mean one thing---you're having that baby SOON. You will do just fine, so stop worrying! And, as SJ said, Garrett and Laura are going to love their new little sister and your husband will be fine too. Chin up, girl!
If I knew you, I'd hug you. (Well, probably not... I'm not a hugger. But I'd at least think about it...)
Thing is, you KNOW that everything is going to be just fine! And the thing about deciding to have a natural delivery? You can always change your mind!
Good luck... Delaney is on her way!!!!!!!
Stacey, dont cry. That is what the kids are going to be doing..... everyday... till they are like 7. Then the mouths begin. One. Right. After. The. Other.
:)
You know I love you girl. You are going to be a GREAT mother of 3. And, you look perfect too. Dont hate your body... you are beautiful.
I dont know what to say to make you feel better, but I will say that I will personally babysit all THREE of them for you and Seth any night you choose. You just let me know.
I love ya girl.
Lucy
Oh honey, it's going to be okay. You know it is. After all, you already have two beautiful babies and they say third times a charm so this one should be more than perfect. Right?
Honestly, I don't know what to say b/c I would be thinking/doing the same thing you are....freaking out. Just know that it's normal (at least for me) and that this too shall pass.
Big hugs!
Everything will be just fine!! You will see. You will be a great mother to all three kids and Laura and Garrett are gonna love their new baby sister to pieces.
I would be freaking out too, it's totally normal.
Stacy, I too remember this all so clearly. I thought I was ruining KJ's entire Christmas when I had Jack, and do you know what he remembers? Jack. Just baby Jack. You aren't ruining anything for the kids - you're enhancing their lives three hundred-fold by adding a playmate to the mix. And your husband? He should be happy that sex is all he's missing out on. I bet he'd rather just miss out on that, than carry and birth this baby right now. Holy hell.
You're going to be great at this. You really can manage it all, and manage it well. Give yourself the credit that is due to you - and lots of it.
Take it one step at a time. You can do it!
And btw, you totally sound like you're about there.
It will be ok. You will have good days and days that you want to lock yourself in your closet w/ a bottle of tequila and a 5 lb. bag of chocolate. Though, if you decide to do that, please give me a call, cause I would be more than happy to help you eat/ drink those things. No one should have to do that alone! I will come to the hospital and bring you your gold stars, either way, drugs or no drugs :) Good luck, call me on my cellphone any time. I will listen to you vent. Love Ya!
Your body is not ruined! Mommy bodies are just ENHANCED. Your husband will still want you, believe me.
I would babysit three kids. Anyway, they say two is the hardest adjustment. Adding a third is a piece of cake. I'm one of three.
I do miss those days of unlimited food of whatever I wanted (I mean the baby wanted) to eat.
Labor will not kill you but for me? Drugs ROCK.
Hey, before you have that baby, can you come over and CLOROX my washer and dryer? Thanks much.
Oh thank God, there is somebody else out there that thinks like I do!
Oh, sister-friend!!!! I am so wanting to see and talk to you!!! Have you had pregnancy pics taken? I'd love to take some for you if not. Maybe that would get your mind off of so much, what I like to call, "mental swimming". Call me anytime, I am here and there but will call you back if I'm not around. Karen :) 239-0816
Post a Comment
<< Home