Babbling

I just wanted any readers I have left to know that I'm STILL HERE! However, I am currently:

1. On a Ben and Jerry's ice cream high.

2. Really pissed that the Mexicans were BOOING Miss USA. All of my products from the grocery store now have to have Spanish and English labels, we have to have ESL aides (English As Second Language) in our classrooms, and THEY ARE BOOING US? #%$%$^%^%$^%$&*&*&*($%#$#@. So that's how I feel about that.

Back tomorrow once the ice cream haze wears off. Goodnight!

I am an April Fool.

No, really! I am! Yesterday, April 1st, was my 31st birthday. I am officially IN my thirties. Blah. Let's just say that an having an unplanned pregnancy, being tremendously overweight, battling Pregnancy Acne, and driving myself out to the Olive Garden at 8:00 pm on my birthday for some tiramisu were NOT part of my vision of myself at 31.

I mean, my 30th birthday last year held such PROMISE, what with the kissing from college boys (I had a blinking pin on my shirt that SAID, Kiss Me, I'm 30...okay???), the drunken hugging, and the jello shots for me AND my mom (like mother, like daughter, right?)...

But anyway...

******************************************************************

I am in the midst of decorating many cakes, learning to make my own fondant for cakes, taking a cake decorating class, AND am nursing a new addiction to cakecentral.com. The obsessive compulsiveness, it encompasses every area of my life, friends.

******************************************************************

I was once again missing in action from my blog (and all of yours!) last week, in part due to my Medication Incident. Here's the short version...

...Forgot to refill *Lexapro*.

Felt okay.

Decided since I was off, to just stay off and save NINETY DOLLARS A MONTH.

On day three of being off the meds, I began being INCREDIBLY BITCHY, TEARY, AND HORMONAL, and began wanting to stay in bed all day.

On day four, I had these weird dizzy spells, and it felt like my brain was short-circuiting about every twenty minutes. Weird.

Google *Lexapro Withdrawal*.

Uh-oh.

Refill meds immediately.

Feeling better now.

So here's a tip for all of you taking meds...DON'T DO THAT. Trust me.

******************************************************************

I live in fear (Yes! Fear!) that you will all stop coming to my blog because 1) I am boring these days and 2) I rarely post anymore. Please come back!!! My Stat counter used to have about 500 hits a week, and now I'm down a few hundred and falling.

I really do have some ideas for good blogs coming up...

*Garrett's birth story

*Laura's birth story

*Baby names!!

*Home school vs. Public school

*Cake pictures

*My elementary school, junior high, high school, and college years...WITH PICTURES!

*An open letter to a certain administrator in a certain school district where I may have worked once.

So stay tuned...I'm trying to get back on the blogging bandwagon!

While I am busy ignoring the children...

WHAT I'VE BEEN READING THIS MONTH:

1. Almost Midnight, by Michael Cuneo. It's the story of Darrell Mease, who murdered three people in the 1980's, and was then pardoned from death row after the Pope's visit to St. Louis in the late 1990's. Fascinating because he actually attended my high school back in the 60's, and the murders occured right down here in my neck of the woods.

2. Shopaholic and Baby, by Sophie Kinsella. I've read all of the Shopaholic books, and they never fail to crack me up. This one is a riot, and especially relevant because I am expecting.

3. The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy, by Vicki Iovine. I've actually read this one twice before, but it's really THAT good.

WHAT I'VE BEEN WATCHING THIS MONTH:

1. "You, Me, and Dupree". I give this one a "B-". It was watchable, and fairly entertaining, but it didn't rock my world or anything. I got it in the mail from Blockbuster Online, which I joined about a month and a half ago. I would have watched many other movies this month, but this one sat for about three weeks before I felt like watching it. The "No Late Fees!" gimmick is soooo not good for procrastinators, like me. It's like I was just waiting to see if they would call me, or send me a nasty email or something. I suppose I like to see just how far I can push my limits.

2. "Borat". I give this one an "A". My husband and I were nearly in tears, laughing our asses off. It takes an AWFUL lot to offend us. So consider yourself warned...it is very crude, but hysterical if you share our sense of humor. It's just one of those things you can't take seriously.

WHAT I'VE BEEN LISTENING TO THIS MONTH:

1. "Buzz Buzz", by Laurie Berkner. I loved it at first, but now that my kids request the same four songs over and over, it makes me want to pull my hair out.

2. "Have A Nice Day", by Bon Jovi. We saw them in concert in November of 2005, and I love every song on this album. If I turn it up loud enough and roll the windows down, it makes me feel like a carefree, rockstar mommy.

3. I want to get the new CD by Paolo Nutini. I love his music...one of his songs is the background music on my MySpace page, if you've never heard of him.

WHAT I'VE BEEN BAKING THIS MONTH: (I TOLD you it was cake season!)

Happy 30th to my friend Andrea:

Happy Birthday to my little brother:

Yes, I just noticed that Harry Potter's lips are a very odd color. He is NOT supposed to be wearing lipstick. Oops:

Okay, this one's not a cake, but I did get paid to make it. It's a mini scrapbook / photo album for someone's new baby:

Yes, ANOTHER Lightning McQueen:

Happy 31st to my friend Erica:

Oh, and also:

BWA-HA-HA-HA!

*UPDATED WITH BRA INFO* News from the homefront, and also a LOT of exclamation points!!!

I'm busy, busy, busy! Here are some updates...

*I have NOT deserted your blogs. I have just not had time to catch up on everyone! I will be back!

*Magic Erasers truly are magic...they removed non-washable marker from a dresser - hallelujah! Now I just need one for my nasty carpet.

*I think I may have felt baby move today! Ultrasound is in two weeks.

*I am a NEW WOMAN. Oprah was not kidding when she said a properly fitted bra can change your life. My lovelies are now positioned front and center, where they have not been since I was seventeen, and there are even cushion-y strap covers to protect my permanent shoulder grooves. Me and my 'new' boobies? We have power.

(And I will also tell you that I GUARAN-DAMN-TEE you wear a much bigger size than you think you do...I was surprised to learn my actual size. I'll only tell you that it's bigger than a D and smaller than a Z, and my husband's eyes are still lit up).

*For all interested parties: I have been through a million ill-fitting, non-supportive, and underwire-poking-out bras from Victoria's Secret, Wal-Mart, and Target. So since I now have the excuse of pregnancy, I went to our local hospital's Women's Center to have them measure me and fit me properly for a good, sturdy bra. Gah, it's fun to be 30.

The bra I got is a totally unglamorous Medela nursing bra, with four rows of hooks in the back, comfy padded shoulder straps, and those fun little drop down cups for nursing (which I don't need yet, but could be fun in the meantime, if you catch my drift...).

It has a 'lace' overlay and a little bow in the center, which are quite sad stabs at making it mildly attractive. It was $37 dollars and worth every penny. So if you're willing to wear a NURSING BRA, for heaven's sake, go get one. Who knows? It could be useful to you at Mardi Gras next year.

*It is cake season! I am taking orders about every other day. Cake Money = Good. However, my carpal tunnel hand (the one I had surgery on in January) is rebelling a bit about having to work so darn hard.

*I am substitute teaching about two days a week and I LOVE it. I may make this my permanent career! But it is limiting my playing-on-the-computer-time, because the other three days that I am home must be completely devoted to my daily slavery chores, like watching soap operas playing with my kids, and making sure we all have clean forks, and underwear.

More later!

I am not Martha Stewart

You all seem amazed at my closet organizing skills, so I'll let you in on my little secrets to organization:

1. I'm slightly obsessive compulsive. Ya think?

2. CHILD PROOF DOOR KNOB LOCKS on every closet door.

3. Nothing, and I mean NOTHING, delights me like organizational materials...tubs, boxes, crates, lidded containers, dividers...gah, it excites me just thinking about it. I even have my Christmas stuff in red tubs with green lids (ah, Target, how I love thee). With all the money I have spent in the "Storage" aisles of Walmart and Target, I probably could have purchased new flooring for my kitchen, new carpet for the living room, and a new couch and loveseat. But I don't really like to think about that.

4. The rest of my house looks like crap. I need to dust, the kitchen floor is sticky, I nearly break a leg every time I try to navigate the toy covered floor, and I have four piles of laundry lying in wait. But by God, the cans of soup in my pantry are divided by flavor, with the labels facing out.

So now you know. I am not Superwoman, I'm just insane.

Also, in other matters...

The matter of my former high school teacher who used a swear word while disciplining students is still up in the air. The school board meeting was last week, and hundreds of people showed up to show support for Mr. C, and over 1500 have signed the petition to reinstate him. The public hearing should be scheduled for sometime in March, and I plan on attending. I'll definitely keep you posted when I know more. But I must say this:

I read last week that two teachers in New York were fired for having drugs at school, one of whom was SNORTING COCAINE WHILE HER FOURTH GRADERS WERE IN THE ROOM. Uh, that kind of makes saying 'fuck' to two eighteen year old delinquents look like a pretty small matter, don't you think?

I guess that's what happens when you live in the midwest. People give their children hunting rifles when they turn ten, but then freak out when a teacher makes ONE slip up and says a bad word.

There's just nothing like living in the Bible Belt, man.